Tuesday, February 24, 2009
I utterly sad today...i did not realise that actually friends who i treat them as family can fake until like that...my impression to them is like devil...now then i realise...perhaps i don't even play a part in their lives...since my impression to them is not good, then what for continue to be my friend and act as if you cared...i'm hurt...really hurt...tears dropped down from my eyes and it can't seem to stop...in my office i cried, in the mrt i cried, on the way home i cried...perhaps nothing can hurt mi except my family and friends...
Perhaps i really don't know how to judge people...others say that i should not be so true to others, learn how to protect yourself, they're not worth it...but still i don't want to not true to them...beacuse i believe that they are true to mi...and today tells mi that i should heed other people's advice...learn how to protect myself...
Perhaps i'm also in the wrong...mi and my temperant temper...i should change...but who's the one who says that this is my attitude, if you all can't accept it then so be it...so now i have to change to suit you...
Perhaps it's just myself being so ignorant about feeling and friends and family...i thought they were the closest friends i ever have and treated them as my family...i never wish that they give mi anything in return...i just hope that everyone is happy...but still actually no one is happy at all i realise...and it's beacuse of mi and my stupid attitude...
Perhaps everything is wrong in the first place...