Sunday, November 30, 2008
I really wonder how much can a person change...perhaps sometimes is just that i don't want to accept...and keep that impression there...that's why I'm feeling so hurt and difficult now...when i can't accept the changes, I simply avoid it...people change, I know...but do you have to change so much that I can't recognize...or it's just that in the first place I've not known you enough...or perhaps you show a different side of yourself in front of mi...I won't have known...sometimes I think that I'm stupid...stupid to believe that people are just what they are in front of mi...perhaps that's why I'm in a fix right now...wondering about my beliefs...
The surroundings have forced mi to accept changes...and go with the flow of the changes...but the problem is that I have never want those changes...that's why i say that I'll never change...cause I don't like them...I hate them...but slowly i realized that I'm changing...I don't know whether it's good or not...adults always tell mi that when you grow up you'll change...I don't believe and tell them I will not...but they always tell mi that is not that you want or don't want...sometimes is you have to...
Why is there so much that must be forced...surroundings are powerful...they're forceful...it's hard to stay firm when the surroundings are so strong...I'm trying to stay firm...but now I feel the stress...and whatever there is...I really hate this...but what can I do with it...I can't change the surroundings...I can't change people...I can't change anything...even myself...
Changes are made not by force, it's whether you want to...but even if I don't want to, I have to...What the hell am I talking about I really don't know anymore...I always contradict myself...